Today is Thursday, June 2, 2011. I am delirious with taper madness, that ghastly beast that haunts marathoners the last 3 weeks before the race. My sources (Runner's World and Coach Ally) tell me I may experience the following symptoms:
1. A sudden, irrational urge to cram in extra miles. Check. These low mileage weeks are playing with my head. My willpower is stretched to the max to restrain myself from long runs. This is a very strange feeling - to think that 5 miles is "a short run."
2. Phantom Pains: You're walking across the room, and you feel a shooting pain in your knee. And you start to think, "How the heck are am I going to run 26.2 miles when I can't even walk across the room???" Check again. My achilles tendons feel funny and the arches of my feet are alternating a strange ache I've never felt before. I woke up on Saturday with an ominous bruise on my left inner ankle. Every joint in my body cracks and pops occasionally. How do they predict these things???
3. Panic. What did you get yourself into? You guessed it - Check! This one is starting to fade now, but over the weekend it hit something fierce. Now I'm alternating between "WTF????" and "Can't wait to get started!"
4. Heavy Legs. Tissue repair, along with the increase in Carbs and water can give you a very normal but disturbing feeling a week before your race. Check again. Another very strange feeling.
5. Weight gain. As you eat more carbs, it helps to store more glycogen and water... which will help you on race day! So don't weigh yourself and wear comfortable clothes. Ahem, I am not breaking out the elastic-waist pants, but yes, check again. I cheated this morning and stepped on the scale. I was shocked, SHOCKED!!! to have gained 2 pounds. (Just kidding - I totally expected and hoped for that.)
So I guess I'm doing this thing right. Somewhere along the way, I turned myself into a runner and it feels good. San Diego - look out! I'll be there soon!!
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